I put a hold on social media last year. I can count how many times I opened Instagram, Twitter, LinkedIn, and others. I removed hundreds of friends from Facebook, those whom I never get in touched with for years or who never interacts with me on Facebook. I mean, people spent a lot of efforts to built their network, and I’ve had plenty. But it’s just not working out for me.
Last year my baby turned 1. Life gets busy with a toddler, true, but that wasn’t my excuse. I limit the amount I use my phone when my child is around, so I don’t browse often. I consciously chose to stop sharing on social media for the following reasons:
1. Privacy. Protecting our identity and private life.
I shared my son’s picture on Facebook so most of my family abroad could see his growth. Until I found Tinybeans, an online growth calendar for your kids that you can share only with chosen people via email. This way, I don’t have to share baby pictures my Social Media friends are not interested in.
Every baby is cute, but there are people who either doesn’t like babies, or is a predator. I want to share pictures only with those who will treasure it. Our lives are shown with each picture posted, and I want to make sure we keep our identity secure, locations unknown to predators, and people’s noses out of my choices.
2. Life’s choices. Protecting my choices.
We all have had unwanted comments. Unwelcomed gestures. We know how uncomfortable it is to deal with that. Especially in public. Moreover when it’s made public. When you post something on social media and people posted judging comments or simply arguing about your choices, it’s all made public. Of course it depends on whether you set your audience to public or friends only, but even then, it’s still your social media ‘public’.
My choices are mine. People can suggest, but never tell a woman what she cannot do. I want to keep my choices, my life’s trouble or concerns, and my new experiences in life, privately mine.
3. Noise reduction = less influence
It’s hard to think clear when there’s so much noise. You’d think it only happens in real life with real noises, but you see, social media is really cramped. Look at Twitter. How many people’s thoughts and how many different concepts can you read in 5 minutes? A lot.
From online marketing promotion to seeing friends going to places we want to go or making choices that might affect what we think, it all became a noise. When I wasn’t focusing so much on what others have accomplished, I became much more presence.
4. Technology have its place and time, being with a child is not one of them.
The way digital media is designed, like any other media form, is to attract you in it so you’d invest your time, and hopefully money, in them. I know it’s so tempting to dive into Instagram or SnapChat when we’re watching little children play, especially when they’re focused on their play.
However, they still see us and will try to seek our attention. They see how much attention we give to this device and they want in! I’m not against screen time. It’s about focusing on real life play where they can practice their fine and gross motor skills, use imagination and increase their creativity, and actually have skills in practical life. My son have his own iPad, but we teach him everything has time and place, so he knows when and how long he’s allowed to have a screen time.
How do you cope with social media and the use of screen when you have children around? There are vast diversity of opinions regarding this matter, and your decision is yours alone. Let’s stop judging each other for once and for all.